How To Handle The Holidays With The Kids After Your Divorce

The holidays are supposed to be a time for joy and family ”“ but divorce throws a serious wrench into that idea. On top of the usual holiday chores (shopping, cooking, taking care of the kids while they’re out of school), you also have to deal with the stress, uncertainty, grief and struggles of separation. Holidays can be especially difficult for children whose parents are divorcing. Here are some useful tips to help your kids get the most out of the holiday season.

Holidays With The Kids During Divorce ”“ Don’t Panic!

Make sure the children know that they will still be able to celebrate, just that it is going to be different this year. There will probably be a lot more traveling ”“ one way to assuage the kids’ fears is to frame it by saying that they get to have two celebrations this year instead of one.

Plan around the best interests of the children. Holiday planning is enough of a struggle as it is, but you should do everything in your power to ensure that this is a special time for the kids. Come up with a holiday division schedule that will minimize their stress, whether this means splitting days or planning your celebrations at a different time than usual.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help from your family or friends.

Create new traditions! Maybe plan an annual ice skating day for the kids, or let them help you make a special holiday recipe.

Take care of yourself when the children are with your ex-spouse. Let them know that you want them to have a good time with your ex, and while they’re out, find ways to keep yourself entertained. Maybe there’s a new movie out this year that you haven’t had time to see (we hear “Arrival” is good), or maybe you could use a spa day.

Try to keep communication between you and your ex-cordial and open. Like it or not, you are going to have to interact with him or her. Keep it civil for the sake of the kids.

Our Denver family law attorneys wish you and yours a happy holiday season!

The End Of The Private Investigator? Digital Data Trumps Physical Evidence In Divorce

It was a staple of 80s and 90s drama ”“ the man in sunglasses, sitting in the front seat of a nondescript van with a telephoto lens, watching the front door of a house to catch someone in a shady act. Hired by the suspicious spouse, the private investigator was ready to capture evidence of lies.

That kind of thing fell out of favor as the Internet became the king of preserving evidence of shady behavior, but private investigators are still around. They’ve taken a secondary role, however ”“ instead of the discoverers, they are the interpreters, hired by attorneys to assist in cases.

These days, it is not difficult to lawfully obtain information that could be relevant to divorce by doing a few simple searches on a computer. While the classical idea of the private investigator may no longer be as relevant as it once was, because of the breadth of information that can be found on spouses through public and private databases, the services of a private investigator can be useful for ploughing through those masses of information to find things that the untrained eye might miss.

How An Attorney Can Help You Find Hidden Digital Data

The electronic discovery process is an integral part of what your divorce attorney can do to help you in your divorce case. We can help subpoena data such as text messages, email communications, social media interactions and data from computer hard drives. Often, data hidden ”“ whether deeply or in plain sight ”“ on these devices proves to be highly relevant to ensuring a just and fair divorce.

Our Denver divorce lawyers are skilled in digital discovery and can help you fight for what you deserve in divorce.

Learn From Their Mistakes: How These Famous People Lost So Much In Divorce

It’s important to plan ahead when entering a marriage, especially if you have significant assets, such as property or money, that you are bringing into the marriage. You should consider a prenuptial agreement to ensure that you retain the rights to certain property, or, if you are already married, you can consider a postnuptial agreement. However, everyone makes mistakes ”“ even those with the most to lose. Learn from the mistakes of these famous people to ensure that you don’t lose it all in divorce.

The Importance Of Preparation For Your Divorce

  • Kelsey and Camille Grammer. Kelsey Grammer was the highest paid actor on television during the 11-year run of “Frasier,” earning $1.6 million per episode toward the end. Shockingly, he did not sign a prenup with Camille. During the divorce, he requested that some of his earnings be declared separate property. His request was granted for the money earned during the first four seasons of “Frasier.” The rest was split 50/50. Kelsey should’ve known better ”“ it was his third divorce.
  • Mel and Robyn Gibson. Mel Gibson’s divorce from Robyn slashed his estimated worth in half due to California law. Because he had no prenup, Robyn made a cool $450 million.
  • Roseanne Barr and Tom Arnold. Interestingly enough, Roseanne actually fired her attorney for suggesting the couple get a prenup. Tom Arnold walked away four years later with $50 million.
  • Craig and Wendy McCaw. Craig was a billionaire thanks to a successful communications company. When he and Wendy decided to divorce, he claimed that his $1.3 billion was mostly his separate property, because it was generated through investments he’d made with his family members. Washington state, at the time, was a community property state ”“ so Wendy made off with $460 million, making her one of the 400 most wealthy people in the United States at the time.

The moral of these stories? First, always consider a prenup. Second, know whether your state is a community property or equitable division state when thinking about marriage (we got you, Coloradans ”“ we’re equitable division here).

Our Denver divorce firm can assist prospective married couples in the drafting of prenuptial agreements for the preservation of assets.

McDreamy Calls It Off: Patrick & Jillian Are Staying Together

It’s been nearly two years since we mentioned the Patrick Dempsey/Jillian Fink divorce, when we talked about the benefits of mediation and how it could help ease the split. Well, it appears we spoke nearly two years too soon ”“ mediation won’t be a factor, because Fink called off the divorce. The papers were dismissed in early November.

The couple originally filed for divorce in January 2015, citing irreconcilable differences. And, while they may not have gone through the legal process of mediation, it certainly sounds like they did some mediation of their own to fight through whatever differences were causing the rift in their marriage. Just ask Patrick:

“Our marriage was not something I was prepared to let go of,” the Grey’s Anatomy star, popularly known as McDreamy, told People Magazine. “I didn’t feel like we had done all the work. And we both wanted to do that work. That’s where it started.”

How Mediation Can Keep Divorce Civil

Mediation is one method that couples can use to get through the divorce process without too many battle scars. Through the use of a neutral mediator, you and your spouse can work through issues in a manner meant to create a fair, balanced outcome. Mediation can help introduce an air of civility to divorce, which can often become contentious. Keeping interactions positive with your spouse can go a long way, especially if there are significant financial issues or children involved in a divorce.

Our Denver family law firm employs skilled mediators who can help facilitate a smooth divorce for your and your spouse.

What Happens To Electronic Data In Divorce?

With the amount of information we put out there online through our use of smartphones and social media, it is not surprising that often, this data is used as evidence in divorce cases. Smartphones are the modern-day filing cabinet, containing tons of valuable information about their owners. Attorneys seek out this information during discovery to ensure both parties receive a fair shake in the divorce. If you post something online, you should assume that that information will make it to your spouse’s attorney.

There are steps you can take to protect your private data, and you should be prepared to do so the moment divorce becomes imminent. Here are a few tips to keep your private data private:

  1. Change ALL your passwords that your spouse may have had access to: your emails, your tablet passcode, your cell phone pin, your online banking and anything else you use on a regular basis.
  2. If you must post on social media, leave out everything related to your divorce, purchases or travels. If you are going to post photos, know that all photos posted from mobile devices carry GPS coordinates in their metadata, and your spouse’s attorney will be combing through that data.
  3. Separate yourself from any shared accounts, including bank accounts and even social media accounts.
  4. Back up any important data on your devices somewhere where only you have access.
  5. Check your privacy settings on social media and, if necessary, remove your spouse from your social media accounts.
  6. Don’t delete anything! Deleting your data is considered spoliation of evidence and will hurt your divorce case.

By digitally separating yourself from your spouse, you protect any valuable information a spiteful spouse might try to use against you while preserving that spouse’s right to electronic discovery.

Our Denver divorce lawyers use cutting-edge discovery tactics to ensure our clients are protected in divorce.

Dissipation Of Assets In Divorce & How To Fight It

In an ideal world, divorcing couples would be able to sit down with one another and separate amicably. Often, this is not the case. In particularly contentious divorces, greed, anger and spite can lead to vicious debates regarding assets. And sometimes, vindictive spouses will fight dirty to enact revenge on their exes. One such trick is known as dissipation of assets, and it can cause serious complications for one or both parties.

Dissipation of assets is a fancy legal way of saying that one spouse wasted marital assets to deprive the other party of those assets. For example, a husband decides to spend a significant amount of money on jewelry for a mistress. That money, in divorce, would be subject to equitable division between both parties, but because the husband dissipated those assets, the wife now faces financial struggles because of her husband’s malice.

Colorado offers some protection against this type of behavior in the form of the Automatic Temporary Restraining Order, or ATRO. This injunction helps prevent either party from disturbing the peace of another party, including prevention of dissipation of marital assets. While the ATRO is in effect, neither party can transfer, encumber, conceal or dispose of property without a court order or the other party’s consent.

Additionally, the services of an attorney can help you prove that dissipation occurred, which can help you fight for a fairer settlement. We can conduct interrogatories and request documents, financial releases and depositions to trace these dissipated assets.

Our Denver family law attorneys are ready to assist you in the process of asset division and protecting your assets from your spouse.

These Two Questions Might Be Able To Predict Your Divorce

Divorce is a complicated thing, but economists suggest that we can boil down a person’s chances of a future divorce using two questions:

  1. On a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being worse and 5 being better, how do you think your level of happiness would be different if you and your partner separated?
  2. How do you think your partner’s level of happiness would be different if you and your partner separated, on the same scale?

The first question is fairly predictable ”“ a score of 5 suggests that divorce is definitely in the cards. But your answer to the second question, as well as whether your answer is correct, could be an even more potent predictor of divorce.

How These Two Questions Can Predict Divorce

The study, conducted by University of Virginia economics researchers, surveyed 3,547 couples, recording their answers to the above questions. They were asked twice, six years apart, during which 7 percent of the couples divorced. For those couples who answered the first question with a 1 or a 2, the divorce rate was lower than usual. For those who answered 4 or 5, the divorce rate was higher than normal.

On the second question, couples who had “incorrect perceptions” of the other party’s happiness were overall more likely to divorce (8.6 percent, compared to 7 percent). But for those who had seriously incorrect perceptions (meaning their perceptions of their spouse’s second answer were off by two points) had a stunning 12 to 14 percent divorce rate. It suggests that, more important than your own happiness in a marriage, an incorrect perception of your partner’s feelings toward the relationship could be more of a predictor of divorce. The study shows that, as the adage goes, communication is key to staying together with your spouse.

Whether you are starting a family, have a marital dispute or need help planning for your family’s future, our Denver family attorneys are ready to assist.

After 13 Years Of Marriage, Slash Claims It Was All Fake

Almost two years ago, guitarist Slash of Guns N’ Roses fame filed for divorce from his wife, Perla Hudson. The two have been married since October of 2001 ”“ or have they?

In a recent revelation, Slash has attempted to convince the judge overseeing their divorce that Hudson is not entitled to a dime of his substantial fortune because the two were never actually legally married. His logic: Hudson was married to a man named Carlos Marty back in 1993, in a marriage that lasted only a month. The two filed for divorce, but apparently, a final judgment was never issued, meaning that Hudson and Marty’s marriage, technically, still exists. That means that Hudson could not have legally married Slash in 2001 ”“ he has called her a bigamist and now wants to withhold all his assets from her.

The question remains: will Slash get away with withholding all his fortune?

Putative Spouses in Colorado

In Colorado (and elsewhere throughout the country), there is an understanding of something called putative spouses. A putative spouse is any person who has cohabitated with another person, to whom he or she is not legally married, but in good faith belief that he or she was married to that person. These cases are rare, but do happen.

Putative spouses have all the rights of legal spouses, including spousal support, child support and property division rights. This means that Hudson may still be able to receive her share of the marital assets from Slash.

If you are engaged in disputes about the validity of a marriage, whether due to a putative spouse situation, common law marriage or other circumstances, our Denver family lawyers can help.

Who Gets The Tickets? What To Do About Time-Sensitive Property In Divorce

With all the hubbub about the rise of the Chicago Cubs, baseball fans have been kicked up into a frenzy, celebrating the momentous victory of the Cubs after 108 years without a World Series win. So, what happens when you’ve got tickets to the crucial game, but your spouse decides it’s time to get divorced?

One woman has taken her estranged husband to court over this very issue. Nancy Riddle of Chicago filed an “Emergency Petition for World Series Tickets” at her local county courthouse. Her husband John Riddle had two tickets that he planned to use to take the couple’s 12-year-old son to Game 4, where the Cubs lost to the Cleveland Indians. Nancy believed that she should have been able to take her son using the tickets, which were purchased by John as part of a season ticket package with some of his friends prior to the divorce filing.

The courts went middle field on their response. While John was allowed to keep his tickets, he was ordered to purchase his wife a comparable ticket as well.

Who Gets Sports Tickets In Colorado Divorces?

Colorado is an equitable division state. This means that property acquired during marriage will be divided equitably (if not equally) in divorce. Using a local team as an example, let’s say a Colorado couple has tickets to the Denver Broncos and both parties wanted to attend the blowout Super Bowl that we won this year (Go Broncos!). If the tickets were purchased during marriage, the courts would likely consider them marital property. As such, both parties would have a claim to the tickets, and through an emergency petition the parties may be able to settle the issue before kickoff.

Our Denver family law firm can help you take control of your family situation to prepare you financially, emotionally and logistically for your future.

Returning To Work After Divorce? Here Are Some Tips To Keep Yourself Afloat

It happens all the time. One parent is out there making the money while the other stays home to raise the kids and take care of the house, but things start to get stressful. People grow apart. Then come those bone-chilling words: “I want a divorce.”

In situations like these, the stay-at-home parent is often disproportionately disadvantaged. While the process of asset division and the potential for spousal support can help the stay-at-home parent stay afloat in the short term, there are still often lingering issues that can prevent that parent from being able to find gainful employment. Perhaps in the time spent raising the kids and keeping house, the parent has allowed his or her education and training to languish. This means that finding a job to maintain a decent lifestyle can be a daunting process. Here are some tips to help those who are returning to work after divorce:

  1. Budgeting is key. Reassess your finances, figure out where you stand and then take inventory of your new needs. If you are not able to find quick employment, your assets from your divorce settlement will have to be stretched to cover you until you find work.
  2. Suppose you get the house, but it’s a three bedroom and the kids have moved out. Do you really need all of that space to yourself? Could you sell it reasonably quickly and move into a more realistically accommodating space? If you can, then the money you get from the sale can be a huge help in moving forward.
  3. Get help updating your résumé. It has probably been a while since you even looked at yours, and what employers are looking for has likely changed since you last had a job. Ask your friends if you can look over their résumés and see if they will review yours for you.
  4. When is the last time you sat down for a job interview? It has probably been a while. That means you need to practice! Whether it is in a mirror or in mock interviews with family or friends, you could benefit from a little rehearsal.
  5. Talk to everyone! Networking is key in our modern job-seeking world. Get on LinkedIn and talk to old friends and coworkers about any opportunities they might be aware of.
  6. Don’t give up!

Our Denver family law firm seeks to provide exceptional client experience throughout Denver.