Can I Empty My 401(k) to Protect It During Divorce?

If you have a substantial amount of money in a retirement account, it is natural to want to protect it in the event of a divorce. You might consider draining your account in order to keep it for yourself, but this is a bad idea that will almost always backfire. Here’s why.

In Colorado, property is divided equitably upon divorce. This is to ensure that neither party is left out in the cold financially. And when divorce is filed for, or when you are served divorce papers, there is an automatic injunction put into place that prevents you from taking drastic actions such as draining your accounts to hide assets. Hidden assets are a big no-no in divorce, because there is almost always a paper trail, and your spouse’s attorney is going to find it. This could have a negative impact on your eventual outcome in your property settlement.

What if My Divorce Hasn’t Been Filed Yet?

Even then, you still should not pull out your retirement funds. If you are entertaining the idea of hiding assets, chances are your spouse would probably not consent to you pulling out your retirement assets. Without your spouse’s consent, the courts could still decide to award your spouse part of your 401(k). This is because of something called dissipation when one spouse wrongfully drains an asset in anticipation of an upcoming divorce. Dissipation is usually the result of intentional misconduct. Dissipation can also be done through what is called “marital waste,” where the value of an asset is reduced or destroyed in an attempt to keep it away from one spouse.

Contact a Divorce Attorney in Lakewood Today

The bottom line is that hidden assets are bad news, and can almost always be found by your spouse’s attorney or the court. If you have concerns about your retirement account and what will happen to it in divorce, instead of taking drastic action, you should speak to a divorce attorney.

Avoid These Mistakes during Divorce (Especially #3)

When navigating a divorce, there are countless wrong turns a person can make. After all, divorce is confusing, courtrooms are intimidating and legal forms are frustrating. But you need to keep a level head; don’t allow emotions or anxiety to overcome you, or you might fall victims to one of the following common divorce mistakes:

  • Trusting that your spouse will be a fair and cooperative party in the divorce. He may be a nice guy; she might be a nice girl. But divorce is a serious matter, so no matter how painful it is, you have to look out for yourself. Expect the worst, but hope for the best. If things go south, consider divorce mediation.
  • Not asking questions. Even if this isn’t your first divorce (it’s more common than you think; in fact, second and third marriages have a higher failure rate than first marriages) you should ask everything you can think of. Ask about your chances of acquiring the assets you desire, like the home or car. Ask about the child custody procedures we have in Colorado. When in doubt, ASK.
  • Letting emotions rule. Now more than ever, you must make careful, reasoned approaches. You’re frustrated. You’re annoyed. You’re angry and sad and maybe a little bit neurotic. That’s normal! But you have to take a step back, otherwise you run the risk of undermining your whole case.
  • Withholding information from your attorney. Your attorney needs to know everything there is to know about your case in order to effectively represent you. By hiding information, you’re only weakening your case.
  • Expecting the court to see things from your point of view. The bottom line is: the judge is his or her own person. Judges are tasked with examining both sides of a case and coming to a satisfactory and fair conclusion. Even if you think you are in the right, the judge may disagree ”“ thus, it is better to take a skeptical, balanced approach to your case. Keep your expectations reasonable.

Divorce Matters ”“ Denver Family Law Attorneys

What to Do When You Kid Chooses Your Ex

Divorce is full of heartbreak and stress, especially when kids are involved. But even when a divorce is long since passed, there are still some words that can shatter a parent’s world. Perhaps one of the worst things a parent can hear from his or her child is that the child wants to move in with the other parent.

This usually happens during adolescence. The kid always has reasons ”“ maybe they have more friends over at Dad’s house, or maybe Mom has more money. It could be a simple matter of “the grass is always greener” syndrome. No matter the reason, those words can lead to feelings of rejection and abandonment. They can make a parent question what they did wrong as a parent, or why the kid prefers to be at the other house.

If your kid has expressed a desire to move in with the other parent, try not to let your emotions get the best of you.

  • As with any matter involving separation or divorce, do not use this as an opportunity to bash your ex. Your child should never be put into a position where they have to choose sides, and badmouthing your ex can actually paint you in a negative light.
  • Discuss changes in visitation (parenting time, as we call it in Colorado) with your attorney. If parental rights have already been established in court, you will have to reconsider the current parenting arrangement.
  • As heartbreaking as it might be for you, respect your child’s decisions. Your job as a parent is to provide a supportive and positive environment for your child, even if that means letting go.
  • These days, it is incredibly easy to remain in meaningful contact with your child, even if they are far away. Apps like Skype and Facetime can allow you to chat with your child face to face, even from halfway across the world. Call often and make an effort to stick to your visitation. Your child still needs you, even if you are not the primary custodian.

Divorce Matters ”“ Denver Family Law Attorneys

Tips for Creating a Child Visitation Schedule

One key way of reducing the potential for conflict when it comes to a child custody situation is penning a visitation schedule that works for both parents as well as the child. A stable schedule can help parents and children avoid confusion about who has custody and when.

The most basic visitation schedule is the repeating cycle. For many parents, this will involve one parent having custody during the week when the child is in school and the other parent having custody on weekends. Depending on the distance between the two homes, this schedule is very flexible. The benefit of a repeating schedule is the ability to plan events and vacations far in advance without the headache of renegotiating custody.

Holidays, Special Occasions and Vacations

A consideration you will have to make when defining a visitation schedule is holidays. You should plan these far in advance and look to both work schedules and your child’s school schedule to determine the most appropriate arrangement. Depending on what days the holidays fall on as well as whether the parents are members of different religions can make this step a bit more complicated, which is why planning far in advance is the best course of action.

The next consideration to make is vacation time and special occasions. Birthdays, graduations and leaving the country are all times you should add to your calendar. With things like birthdays and graduation, it is easy to plan in advance, so you should do so; vacations, on the other hand, can be more impromptu. You must discuss these with your spouse before you finalize plans to ensure that a satisfactory custody arrangement can be made. If you wish to take your children for a week’s vacation in the Bahamas, you should be willing to concede a week to your ex as well; compromise is key to ensuring that a visitation schedule is best for the kids.

The common theme in these considerations is planning ahead. Of course, the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry; because of this, you should always be willing to listen to your ex and work together to create the best possible schedule.

Divorce Matters ”“ Denver Family Law Attorneys