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Should I Base My Divorce Demands On Other Divorcees’ Settlements?

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Woman with piggy bankHow much of your marital assets are you owed in your divorce? If it is your first time going through divorce, you might not have any idea what to expect when your assets are divided and the divorce is finalized. Will you get the house? The car? How much of the joint savings will go to you? Retirement funds? Stock options? It’s a lot to think about!

Naturally, your best bet in learning what to expect is to speak to someone who knows ”“ but that doesn’t mean speak to other divorcees to see what they got in their divorce settlements. Maybe your best friend or your sister have gone through this before, and you’re curious to see how well off they were after divorce ”“ but they are not the ones you should be basing your expectations on. Here’s why.

Stop Listening To Your Friends””Every Divorce Is Different

If you start probing into the lives of friends, friends-of-friends or family members who have gotten divorced, you might not stop to think that there is no one-size-fits-all divorce settlement. Maybe you are planning on paying a certain amount of child support, until you hear from your cousin that his friend doesn’t have to pay any at all, despite having less time with the kids than you do. Or perhaps you make much more money than your spouse but don’t think it’s fair that you will be paying temporary spousal maintenance while your brother didn’t have to when he got divorced.

It is important to remember you are only hearing one side of the story, and you are lacking the full set of facts. It’s easy to think that you are being given a bum deal in divorce when it seems like everyone around you is doing great.

You should talk to someone about what you want in a divorce, and what you think is fair ”“ but that someone should be an attorney, not Jane Doe who lives at the other end of your street. Don’t be afraid to ask your attorney questions about how divorce works in Colorado and why the terms of your divorce are the way they are. If you don’t understand the documents, speak up. If you don’t know why you have to pay alimony, speak up. Knowledge is power, and ultimately your goal should be to ensure a fair divorce settlement. Don’t get angry because of the way other peoples’ divorces go ”“ they are not you, and their divorce is not the same as yours.

Our Denver divorce attorneys offer mediation services for prospective divorce clients and are committed to ensuring equitable distribution of assets in your divorce.