How to Get Back into Dating in Aurora

Your divorce was finalized a year ago and you’ve adjusted to life as a single man or woman. By now, you may be missing having a partner in your life. Perhaps it would be nice to have someone to have dinner and do things and engage with on a romantic level.

Everybody has their own timeline when it comes to dating after divorce. Some people wait six months, while others wait a year. Two years is the golden rule for some people. Whatever you decide, you’ll have to prepare for your return to the dating world.

Depending on how long you’ve been married, you may not have dated in many years or even decades. Dating is different now, and you’ll need to take some time to get used to the dating game again. Here are some tips to help you find love again.

Getting Ready to Date Again

Before you start meeting new people, reinvent yourself by updating your wardrobe. Your work outfits may not be enough to make you stand out. Colorful clothing with accessories may do the trick.

Where to Meet New People

If your routine consists of going to work, swinging by the grocery store and heading home, you’ll need to change things up a little. In order to meet people, you’ll need to make an effort to get out more. Join a gym. Sign up for a class in something that interests you.

A bar might be a good place to find a date””but not just any bar. Consider hanging out a more upscale bar, such as one in a restaurant or hotel. Sit at the bar””not at a table””and order a drink or some food. These bars tend to have friendly people, so you’re sure to meet some fun people who are not necessarily looking to get drunk or have a one-night stand.

Many people find dates through speed dating. Speed dating allows you to meet a dozen or so men or women in a short amount of time. You sit down with them for a few minutes, and then when time is up, you move on to the next “date.” It’s a quick way to get to know people.

If you’re having trouble meeting potential dates in person, try online dating. Many people are in long-term relationships with people they met online.  There are many sites that can connect you with others who have similar interests.

Seek Advice from an Experienced Aurora Divorce Lawyer about Dating After Divorce

Divorce is a scary situation, and it marks a big change in a person’s life. After a divorce, you may feel lonely and want to begin a new relationship. The Aurora divorce attorneys at Divorce Matters can help you move on after your marriage ends and advise you on any other issues regarding family law in Colorado. For help with your divorce and the new life that awaits you, contact us at (720) 408-7469.

Divorced with a Dating Profile? Don’t Fall for This Scam!

Heartbreak hurts. But don’t let heartbreak blind you to deception, or you may end up paying a high price. If you are recently divorced with a dating profile, be careful.

Every year, federal Internet crime investigators receive thousands of tips involving online romance scams; just last year, victims of these scams reported a total of more than $82 million lost to scammers. A Colorado woman who recently divorced fell victim to one such scam, to the tune of $510,000, after meeting a new man on

The woman, known only by the name Joy, signed up for the dating website and quickly became enamored of a man called “Michael Vinci.” He claimed to be an international businessman. They emailed regularly and spoke on the phone, and Vinci even wrote Joy “unbelievable” love letters. But as they say, if it sounds too good to be true.

Six months into their relationship, Vinci asked Joy for a short-term loan in the ballpark of $300,000 for a business deal. Joy had the money from her divorce settlement in an investment account and blinded by her feelings for the enigmatic Vinci, she pulled out the money. And because it was an investment account she took money from, the IRS and Colorado Department of Revenue got involved, sapping more and more money for taxes. Immediately following the transfer of funds, Michael Vinci vanished.

Joy had planned to use the money to buy a new house, but now that is a distant dream. She lives with a relative out of state and faces the horrendous financial aftermath of one bad decision in a moment of intense vulnerability. Let this be a lesson to those in grieving over their lost marriages ”“ it is okay to feel depressed or heartbroken after a divorce, but stay vigilant.

The family law attorneys at Divorce Matters serve the Greater Denver area.

Is It Okay to Date during Divorce?

When is it too early to start dating after you’ve decided to get a divorce?

It’s different for everyone; some people take years to get over a former spouse, while others are quick to mingle with other singles once the papers have been finalized. Some even start dating other people before the divorce is final ”“ but is this a good idea?

Legally speaking, there’s little to dissuade you from moving on to a new partner, at least in Colorado. While some may cry adultery if a divorce is not final before a person moves on to someone new, Colorado’s courts do not take adultery into account in divorce matters. This is because Colorado is a no-fault state ”“ the court does not care why the marriage has failed, only that it is irretrievably broken.

Aside from the legal matters, there are also emotional implications to consider. Even if you have separated from your spouse before you start dating, emotions can still be high, and moving on so fast can lead to animosity from your ex. This could motivate him or her to be more aggressive in the divorce proceedings; he or she might, for example, fight harder for custody of the kids, or demand more from you than a fair compromise would entail. Especially when you have kids, it is important to remain cordial with your spouse during a divorce, and a new relationship can make it difficult for that to happen.

Furthermore, the time immediately following divorce is a time of emotional vulnerability. Yes, it always feels good to feel wanted or needed, which is often the reason divorcees will move on quickly. However, you need time to process your feelings and to truly leave the marriage in the past ”“ you will likely still be dealing with your ex for some time to come, and it is unfair to new partners to put them in the middle of such a sensitive time.

Divorce Matters ”“ Denver Family Law Attorneys

Dating after Divorce

You might feel pressured post-divorce to start dating again. Perhaps your friends or relatives might encourage you, or you might feel stressed at the prospect of spending time alone. But figuring out when you are ready to date is a decision you should make for yourself, not to placate your social circle.

Here are some tips to follow when dating post-divorce:

  • It’s up to you when to start dating again, not your calendar. Some people might be ready after a month or two, while some take years. Work through your feelings before diving back into the dating scene.
  • If you’re still thinking about what your ex is doing or who he or she is dating, you are probably still too distracted for a healthy relationship.
  • Accept yourself as an individual. Being in a relationship should not define your identity. Take some time to explore life on your own terms, as jumping into a new relationship just to avoid being single is unhealthy for you and unfair to your dating partners.
  • Especially when you’ve been involved in a long-term relationship, you may find that the dating scene has changed since you were last involved. Nowadays it is not uncommon to utilize online dating sites, which take some of the guesswork out of finding other singles. If you are ready to date, don’t shun online options as nontraditional ”“ they are rapidly becoming the norm.
  • Dating is an adult decision. It is fine to worry about how your children might perceive you dating other people, but don’t let them stop you if you feel ready to date again. Do be careful ”“ your children are also coping with your divorce, and being too flagrant or quick with your children meeting new partners can cause a backlash. You should only introduce your children to a potential partner that has long-term prospects, and when you do so, you should ease your children into the idea of having that person around.

Divorce Matters ”“ Denver Family Law Attorneys